When John & I moved in together and relocated to Queensland we had some difficulties with the carrier that came to collect our container. Originally we had specified a date, then five days before hand they phoned and said that they had to pick it up in two days.
So 5pm on Friday was it...!!!
Two days...!!! That was three days earlier than we had planned...do you know how much can be achieved in three days of packing up a house..?? My house was already packed and vacated, most of our things safely in the container. I was exhausted after doing that single-handedly, and hadn't quite planned on having to pack up John's house too, most of which hadn't been done. He has so much "stuff"...accumulated over many years and most of which never sees light of day. It was hard work, really hard work and we were just exhausted. John has moved many times in his life but has never moved himself, a removalist has always done it so he really had no idea of how long it was going to take to pack.
Lunchtime on Friday comes and we had measured out the container and found we had a place for everything we wanted to take...fantastic.
Well, it was fantastic until the carrier showed up at 2pm instead of 5pm as arranged. The container had to go. We ran like lunatics to throw everything into it that we could...the driver was getting impatient and very antsy as he was due to be elsewhere. He showed us his manifest and sure enough, it said 2pm for our pickup...tried to phone the office but no joy, they had gone for the weekend it seemed. Eventually we could fit no more in the container, none of it was packed as we had arranged and we could not fit it all in...had we had the time to pack it properly it wouldn't have been a problem. Thankfully we remembered at the last millisecond to throw the trolleys into the container.
There was some kind of elated relief as the container disappeared around the corner leaving the detritus of our lives spread across the front lawn. A few calls later and we had a storage locker close to John's house so the next day or two was spent doing a final pack up.
Of course this left us with a problem...where to sleep..?? Kids were all deposited at their respective grandparents homes for a few days farewell visit and John and I hightailed it down the highway to Melbourne to stay at the Sofitel.
Reception staff were taken aback when we arrived to check in...we were filthy and I'm sure we didn't smell too good either. It had been a stinking 37C degrees (that's 98.5 for those still on the Fahrenheit scale). It was utter bliss to walk into our room, the cool of the room was just heavenly. A long bath with a gin & tonic in hand was the order of the day for me, then dinner at the restaurant while watching a storm roll into the city from the 52nd floor, just stunning. I loved that man so much for thinking ahead and making the booking...we had 3 nights there. We worked hard during the day at the house but to go "home" to the Sofitel and it's amazing view was just heavenly.
Fast forward 18 months to now...
Our things in storage arrived this week...we decided that yes, we would get them sent here and not have to pay storage fees any more, probably a fiscally prudent decision.
John started unpacking it on Saturday and my mostly tidy home just disappeared under piles and piles of John's lifetime of accumulated "stuff"...there is no other word for it, well, no other nice word for it anyway. I was too overwhelmed with the piles of it to do anything to help...it was just taking over. I'm struggling with his need to hang onto so much of it, it's an aspect of his make-up that I haven't encountered before. John is (usually) a very practical, no-fuss person...it's part of what attracted me to him...this just seems to fly in the face of that.
I understand that he is probably hanging onto a lot of it for sentimental reasons. For those of you who don't know, John's wife (and the boy's Mum) died 11 years ago...I have to be respectful of that but still...this goes waaaaaaaaayyy beyond that. I don't know what will happen to it when he is no longer on this planet, I can't see the boys wanting any of it.
I feel very overwhelmed, very much like my home has been taken over. Matilda commented last night that she felt like she was living in someone else's house (but was referring to our changing the living room around). She nailed it in one though...it does feel like I am living in someone else's house. We talked last night about new curtains for the living area...need a trip to Spotlight to choose fabric...might also sew some cushion covers for the floor cushions and do a trip to Ikea for some bits & pieces to "lift" the room.
Meanwhile, I'm still coming to terms with the hoarding and inability to get rid of things. Is this a "man" thing..?? Do women do it too..??
Can anyone shed any light on the subject...if so I would be most grateful.
Cooeeee.......Is there anyone out there?
1 month ago