Monday, August 18, 2008

Homesickness, Illness, Matilda's Photos...bit of a ramble...

I haven't been a good blogger...

My apologies for being absent this last week...sometimes my attentions and energies are needed elsewhere, at home and for me in this case, perhaps selfishly.

I have a big case of homesickness at the moment. We left Victoria over 18 months ago and I have found that it can strike hard, really hard without warning. It usually hits on the weekends, times when I would be doing things with them

I am missing my friends...I could live anywhere in the world with my friends within reasonable distance. Despite many promises there has only been a visit from one friend since living in Brisbane. I understand and feel no malice nor blame for broken promises...I just miss them.

John has suggested, even insisted, that I take a trip to Victoria for a week or so to catch up with them. I won't even entertain that thought at the moment, he is still very much unwell and although back at work is finding the vertigo and constant tinnitus quite disabling. He is being stoic, very much so...to the point where I just haven't been able to read what is going on with him and was so worried he was much sicker than he was letting on or that there was something critically wrong with him...his wall was about ten feet high and he wasn't letting me in. The higher the wall became the more morbid & skewed my thoughts became. I crumbled last night, the tears came and we had a full & frank discussion and I impressed my need to understand exactly what is going on with his health. I think he "gets it" now and I am feeling more relaxed tonight.

Anyway...I won't go away and leave him holding the reins until he is well again or I can take Matilda & Myles with me...it's too much to ask of him to do it all here. I can suck it up and put on my big girl knickers for that long.

Hmmm...I wasn't going to post much tonight, it's way past bedtime and John is already sleeping soundly. I have been up way too late these last few nights, have been caught up with watching the track & field events in Beijing.

However, I did promise Matilda I would post some of her recent photos.

She has taken a keen interest in photography of late, always has her camera with her and has taken some fantastic action shots. She has an "eye" for unusual angles...she uploaded these yesterday...I find them oddly compelling.

They were self portraits taken through a magnifying glass. She was just "playing" with her camera as she often does...the results are almost creepy.

Time for bed...it's late and I'm tired. I promise I'll try to post more regularly over the next few weeks.

2 comments:

Lynda said...

Sometimes we miss our friends more than anything else. You just don't realize how much every cell of your being NEEDS friends until you aren't near them. Even the ones that drive you nuts.

Here's hoping John makes a full recovery.

And Matilda? I think her photos are compelling and artistic. What a neat kiddo you have!

Karin said...

Just quickly.... those photos of Matilda's are IN CRED I BLE!!! Wow!!!

I'll be back later but I wanted to say tell you this!!