Matilda went out shopping with a friend yesterday. As far as I knew she was getting the train to her friend's home then her friend's Dad was driving them to the shopping centre.
When she got home she mentioned that her friend (who turned 16 on 29th March and sat for her Learner's Permit test the following day) had driven them to the shopping centre. This was only the second time she had been behind the wheel.
I'm afraid I reacted badly, I was quite horrified that her friend's father would consider taking Matilda in the car with his (brand new Learner )daughter driving. He may well have faith in her ability but I don't...how can a 16 year old learner driver with less than 2 hours driving experience possibly react well to situations other drivers put her in on the road...??? It's not like it is a quiet route either, it gets quite busy.
I have spoken to Matilda and after my initial reaction explained why I felt as I did and said that at no time was I happy with her being in a car with such an inexperienced driver and that it wasn't to happen again.
I have to take her to her friend's party this evening and am going to have to make my feelings felt to her parents, not really looking forward to that but they are very reasonable people so it should be okay.
Did I overreact..??
Thoughts please...
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6 comments:
No, you TOTALLY did not overreact; I would have felt the same way, and in fact one time did not allow Hannah to go to an amusement part three hours from here because the person who was driving there was only 16, and it is in a big city. Nope, not at all, and I hope Matilda can understand that. My thinking is that there are enough dangerous thigns for our kids out there that we don't have to deliberately expose them to them, you know?
I'm not completely familiar with how one gets a driver's license in Australia. In the US, the kids have to have a learner's permit for at least six months before they're even allowed to take the driver's test. My sister had to wait a year before taking her driver's test. She passed. That very day she totaled my Mom's car.
I would have gone off the deep end if I was you. You cannot replace a daughter or son. I would definitely speak with the parents as well as hit home with Matilda the importance of saying "no" even if it makes her uncomfortable. Poor you. I don't envy the challenges presented with the teenage years.
Hi Amy...
Requirements are different in all states here but in Queensland you can sit the Learner's Permit test at 16 and for the driving test at 17 but you must have a log book showing 100 hours practice (minimum) in varying driving conditions...(to be increased to 200 hours on 1st July, 2010).
Matilda has just turned 16 and will sit for her Learner's Permit next week (which quite frankly scares the crap out of me). I have organised at least three lessons with a driving school for her before she gets behind the wheel of my car. The local transport authority recognises a lesson with a professional as equivalent to three hours driving. She will then have a lesson a month (at least) until she sits her test. Her school also runs Driver's Ed, which she will undertake later this year.
I spoke calmly about it today with her and she understands where I am coming from. She also knows that all she has to do is call if she needs to be picked up...I would prefer to do that any time of day or night rather than get in the car with someone who is unsuitable to drive.
We really can't complain, she is really quite an amenable teenager and I think the worst has passed. She is quite conservative in many ways, which I don't mind at all and a great student. We have moments but they are usually short lived.
I think we will navigate our way around this one, I just need to take deep breaths and be very clear about expectations and what is acceptable.
I would have freaked Kerrie! Totally understand and I'm sure Matilda does now that you've explained. Luckily no harm resulted other than maybe a few grey hairs for you! love and hugs
I would have been really upset too.
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